School is back in session! For me, there is always mixed emotions getting back into school. It's bitter sweet to say goodbye to the kids and it's bitter sweet to start routines and schedules again. I have also decided the first week of school ranks right up there with Christmas as one of the most stressful times of the year. Last week was exceptionally stressful and emotional in our home as all 4 of my daughters started new schools. I was so overwhelmed because they were so overwhelmed! I am hoping this next week brings a little more peace and calm as they get used to their new schools, new teachers and new friends. Heaven help us!!
It's so good to be blogging again! I have missed writing because it always fills me with so much joy. I just love it! It is part of who I am and part of my purpose.
I learned many valuable lessons this summer, one of which I wanted to share with you today. It is about my sweet little nephew, Paxton Norton.
Paxton passed away on July 17th after contracting a quickly spreading illness that went from his lungs, to his bronchial tubes, to his blood at which point his blood became septic. When the blood is septic, its basically poisoned and there is nothing much left the doctors can do. He died in his parents' arms surrounded by his 2 brothers and grandparents 4 days after his 3rd birthday.
Little Paxton had a very rare chromosomal deletion on his 7th chromosome that my sister knew about before she even gave birth to him. She knew there would be many complications with her little boy, but wasn't sure exactly what they would be because there were no reported cases in history just like Paxton's. He was one of a kind in more ways than one. When he was born, he had glaucoma in his eyes, hearing problems, and a cleft pallet. He had a narrowed airway that necessitated in a tracheotomy for breathing and a g-tube for getting food into his tummy. His voice box was not in the right place thus my sister never heard him cry or laugh or talk. He had two holes in his heart, pulmonary hypertension (problem with his lungs), enlarged kidneys and ventricles and probably many more issues that I wasn't even fully aware of. Paxton had 34 surgeries during his short life. He required 24-hour care. Thankfully his parents got nursing help during the night time so they could sleep, but my sister cared for him during the day, every day. Paxton and my sister Shannon are truly my heros.
But all of this difficulty did not define this little boy or his life. He was so much more and he did so much more! Despite all the surgeries, the physical pain and the discomfort he felt so often, he lived in the moment, treasuring his family and friends and the world God gave him to enjoy. He embraced every moment of his life. My sister is a photographer and took several photographs of little Paxton relishing life. There is one of him basking in the wind as it blew on his face and through his soft, downy hair. There is one of him reveling in the feel of the grass on his palms. There is another of him absolutely delighted as he watched the sunset, marveling in the beauty, the light and the colors. My favorite pictures of Paxton are of him reaching up to touch his mom's, dad's or brothers' faces, memorizing every curve and bend of the faces of those he loved most and connecting with their souls.
We believe that Paxton signed up for a 3 year mission. He long overstayed his needed proving time here on earth, but he stayed because he loved his family and God's beautiful world and . . . because we needed him. We needed his example to teach us not just how to live, but how to live well, live fully, and live happily. We needed the light and joy that he brought to us simply by smiling. His smile was contagious and it will forever be written on my heart.
One of the greatest lessons Paxton taught me was to always look up and look towards the light. Paxton always did this. My sister said that every morning when she would get him out of bed, he would have to turn to look towards the sunlight streaming through the window blinds. He loved looking towards the light. He always looked up too and his sweet hand would follow his gaze as he reached up. My sister had a video monitor in Paxton's room so that she could always keep an eye on him if she had to step out of the room. One of her favorite pictures of Paxton was when he was laying on his floor in his room all by himself. She caught a moment on the video where he was reaching up and looking up with a huge smile on his face. She believes he was seeing his guardian, ministering angels who watched over him. Shannon called these his "friends" because she knew that Paxton saw them, loved them and knew who they were even though she didn't. Paxton had angels watching over him, but for us, Paxton was our angel. He was sent here to teach us precious, special lessons about life. Now he gets to be our angel in heaven. Shannon said at his funeral, "You were our perfectly imperfect angel, and now you are our perfectly perfect angel."
Do you see why this little boy was so special? Do you grasp the invaluable life lessons that we can learn from one so small? I imagine Paxton would tell us something like this . . .
"Embrace life. Live in the moment. Enjoy God's beautiful world that He created for you, for your joy and happiness. Treasure every moment with those that you love. Don't take any time you have with them for granted because life is so fragile and can be taken from you at any moment. Be and do all that you were created to be and do. Don't waste any time worrying about what the world thinks. You are not on earth to live for the world's purposes. You are on earth to live for God's purposes. So trust in Him. Believe in Him. Love Him because He loves you more than you know. Go to Him and He will help you uncover the truth of who you are. He knows the truth because He created it and He created you. Then go live that truth with passion and purpose. That is how you will find your joy. And even when life seems harder than you can bear, never give up. Look up. Reach up. Turn towards the Source of all light, even God, in order to not only find the strength to endure this life, but to endure it well. Most importantly, be grateful to God for the life you do have and . . . SMILE!"
May we all learn from Paxton how we can better live and love life no matter what difficulties and trials, weaknesses and faults we may have.
I believe Paxton's life very much epitomizes what I am trying to teach on this blog in the word "be.YOU.tiful". Paxton was an absolutely beautiful soul because he lived according to the truth of who he was . . . and he was happy! He remained untouched by the world despite the difficulties he faced due to his frail frame. He let his light shine brightly for the world to see touching thousands of lives. Although he couldn't move and he couldn't speak, as a close family friend put it, "Seldom has the life of one child blessed the lives of so many in such a brief period of time." We all have the opportunity, the ability and the responsibility to live as Paxton lived. In the words of the scriptures:
Ye are the light of the world. . . . Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in Heaven.
Matthew 5:14, 16
...that the works of God should be made manifest in him.
John 9:3
So go be like Paxton by being your beautiful, true, authentic, unique self! Let your light shine so the works of God may be made manifest through you! In other words . . .
be.YOU.tiful!!!
P.S. If you would like to learn more about Paxton, you can Google Paxton Norton and many news clips and articles will pop up. One of my personal favorites is the talk my father, Elder Ronald A. Rasband, gave about little Paxton in the April 2012 LDS General Conference entitled "Special Lessons". Click here to go directly to it. You can also check out my sister's blog by clicking here.
