From "Ugh. Exercise." to "Yeah! Exercise!"

I recall once when my husband came back from going mountain biking.  He had taken his GoPro with him so he wanted to show me what he had recorded.  I watched and wondered how he could possibly enjoy mountain biking when he was panting like crazy as he worked so hard to climb a steep hill.  He said, "Oh I just love it!  I get so excited to go!"  And I thought, "How could you love to work out like that?  That just seems exhausting and not fun at all!"  It just boggled my mind how he actually looked forward to and loved exercising.  In my last post, I talked about all the things I "had" to do and how that attitude toward life made me miserable.  Well, exercising was one of those things I had to do.  It was a chore.  I did not enjoy working out at all and I most definitely did not look forward to it.  I guilted myself into doing it because everyone else said it was what I ought to do.  I was told all the time that if I wanted to lose weight then I had to work out.  If I wanted to be healthy I had to exercise.  So that is why I exercised.  Because I had to.  Remember my focus was always on losing weight and looking better.  And because that was my focus, I would get really gung-ho about a certain type of exercise because that was the "best" thing to do at the time in order to lose weight.  But after some time, I would lose all motivation because it wasn't helping me in the way I wanted.  I wasn't losing the weight like I had expected so I would lose my drive and fall once again into my pit of despair and apathy.  "Why even try if nothing ever works?"  Over and over again.

Because I compared myself to every living breathing woman, I had a very hard time with group workout classes.  I compared myself to all the women who were tinier and more fit than I was and so I would leave feeling worse than when I got there.  The only group class I did was spinning because all the lights were usually turned off therefore I couldn't really see anyone else and they couldn't really see me.  So I would spin and run.  That led me to do some triathlons and a marathon.   But even the races were my way of proving to the world that even though I didn't have a great body, I could still compete.  Because I didn't believe I was good enough, I was trying to prove to the world through my outward ability that I was.  Actually, what I was really doing was trying to prove to myself that I was good enough.  I remember the last triathlon that I did.  It was with a group of friends and we all went down to Lake Powell to do the triathlon there.  I remember sitting in the back room of the houseboat we stayed on crying because I was the biggest one there out of our group who were competing.  I felt completely inadequate, insecure and literally didn't know if I could allow myself to do the race.  I felt so ashamed with how my body looked at the time.  I did ok in the race, but the shame I experienced convinced me to never do another race until my motivation for doing it had changed.  I was exhausted with trying to keep up with the world and trying to be the best in all that I did and in how I looked.  I didn't want to do any more races in an effort to prove to myself and to the world that I was ok.  I wanted to first believe that I was ok and then do a race because I wanted to do it and because I loved it.

I am grateful for my husband and his example because he has inspired me to do things because I want to and because I love doing them.  I am so grateful to say that I have arrived at that point.  The workouts I do now I do because I love them and crave them!  I still spin because I have realized I absolutely love it!  And would you believe it . . . I even do a group class!  I have become internal instead of external when I workout so I don't spend the whole class comparing myself to the other women.  I literally get so focused on the move that I tune out everyone else around me.  I am amazed at what I can do when I am internal, in the moment, and completely focused on executing the move.

Repeat of Favorite Quote # 20:

Take out the trash.  The trash is anything that's keeping you from the only thing that matters.  This moment, here, now.  And when you truly are in the here and now you'll be amazed at what you can do and how well you can do it.

Peaceful Warrior

When our workouts become about the workout instead of the company we are with, then we will be amazed at what we can do!  When our workouts become about what we love instead of what is acceptable to the world, then we will feel on top of the world when we exercise!

Repeat of Favorite Quote #34:

Everyone tells you what to do and what's good for you.  They don't want you to find your own answers.  They want you to believe theirs.  I want you to stop gathering information from outside yourself and start getting it from the inside.  People are afraid of what's inside.  And that's the only place they're ever going to find what they need.

Peaceful Warrior

So what are our reasons for working out?  Is it to lose weight?  Is it to prove to other people that we are good enough?  Is it to be caught up with the trends of what is the "best" workout so that we can "fit in"?  If we are working out for external reasons, we will not enjoy it.  And then because we don't enjoy it, we won't do it regularly and then we will get frustrated that its not making a difference and then we'll quit.  When we exercise because we love it and because it makes us feel good and helps us have a better day, then we will finally enjoy it and even crave it!  Then we will do it more often and then we will see a change in our bodies.  It all starts with being true to you and loving what you're doing!

So there are three things we need to do.  We've already talked about the first thing many times.  Becoming aware and letting go!  As you let go emotionally, you'll find your attitude towards life changes.  You'll find that you're not so worried about what others think, but about doing what you want and what's best for you.  This then brings us to the second thing - finding what exercise you love to do.  I'm not talking about what all your girlfriends are doing.  I'm not talking about what is the most intense and hardest workout that will totally kick your rear so that you can lose weight.  What do you love?  What exercise do you get excited about doing?  No more worrying about what the world thinks.  No more worrying about losing weight.  No more worrying about getting into a pair of jeans.  So many of us have destination syndrome.  "Oh I'll be happy when I weigh ___ lbs."  "Oh I'll be happy when I can fit into a size _ pair of jeans."  I have done that so many times!  The problem with this mentality is that even when I would get to that weight or fit into that pair of jeans, I would still be unhappy.  Why?  Because I hadn't changed what was on the inside.  Have you ever considered the fact that our bodies are doing the very same thing with weight that we are doing with our thoughts and feelings?  Our body is holding onto the negative unhealthy weight because we are holding onto the negative unhealthy thoughts and feelings.  As we let go emotionally and mentally, our body is then able to let go physically.  If we take our time and change ourselves from the inside out, not only will the change be permanent, but we will find happiness all along our journey!  

Favorite Quote #36:

Happiness is in the journey, not the destination.

I have been amazed this past year as I have focused on becoming aware and letting go as opposed to focusing on food and weight.  I have been so much happier!  And the weight has come off as a natural consequence of doing these other things.  Unfortunately, the harder we hold on to something, the more we push it away.

Favorite Quote #37:

Happiness is like a butterfly; the more you chase it, the more it will elude you.  But if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder.

It will come!  If you listen to your body and do the things you love and what's best for you, then the weight will come off.  So let's turn our attention to becoming aware and letting go.  Let's turn our attention to enjoying our workout not just suffering through it in order to lose weight or fit in.  Find what YOU love and crave!  be.YOU.tiful!!

I am at the point now where I crave my workout!  It is the coolest feeling because for so long I dreaded working out.  I love the time I have for me in the morning where I take care of my body.  It is amazing how much better of a day I have when I can take some time for me.  So here is the final thing we need to do.  Remember in my last post I talked about taking time for yourself physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and socially.  Each of these areas need to be balanced and taken care of if we want to have peace and joy.  If you're frustrated and depressed, part of the reason is because your life is out of balance.  So schedule time to take care of you!  It is not selfish!  No one else can take care of you like you can!  Only you can give you what you truly need.  I know a lot of us are young mothers with several children and time for ourselves is very hard to come by.  But you will be happier, calmer, more selfless and a more loving mom if you first take care of you.  How many of us have been on a trip away from our kids and come back totally loving them and pumped up to be the best mom ever?  Isn't that what happens?  So why wait for a trip to feel that way?  Don't we want to feel that way every day?  We do it by scheduling some needed "me time" every day so that we can be a better mom, spouse, and individual.  Remember that success is scheduled.  Your "me time" is so important!  Carve out some time for you during the day that nothing gets in the way of.  You have my full permission to guard and protect your "me time".  It is not selfish!  It is necessary in order for us to be the best we can be in all areas of our life!!!

Over the last couple of years, I have tried several workouts.  I did cross fit/boot camp for a year which was intense and amazing!  If YOU enjoy that type of workout then my trainer and his assistants were great!  They know cross fit!  His gym is in Lindon, UT if you are in the area.  He also offers private training sessions.  Here is a link to him - Mat Gover and EXL Fitness.  

I am currently attending a ballet bar type workout called Karve which is also in Lindon, UT.  I have come to love this workout as it combines yoga with strength training.  I found I needed a workout that calmed my soul as well as worked my muscles and this workout fit the bill.  Plus its changing my body.  My muscles are more long and lean than they have ever been before.  Its pretty amazing and I crave it!  I crave Karve!  Here is the link - Brooke Kempton and Karve.

I'm not telling you these things because I want you to do what I have done.  I only offer you these ideas because sometimes it takes some experimenting to find what we love the most.  I ran for a long time thinking that I loved it but I have realized that I never got as excited to run as I did to spin.  I still enjoy running, but spinning is my love!  So find what YOU love!  Try different things to find what is the best fit for your personality and lifestyle.  Then throw away any guilt that you may not be doing what is the "best" or "most intense" workout.  If you love to walk then walk.  If you love to swim then swim.  If you love to do aerobics or Zumba or yoga then do it!!  Just do what YOU love!  Don't worry about what the world thinks or about what your body looks like when you workout.

Favorite Quote #38:

Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.

Dr. Seuss

Forget about all the people out there who judge you based on what your body looks like.  They don't matter!!  The people who love you and support you are the ones that matter and they don't care what your body looks like!  So just do what YOU love!  When you do, you will be amazed how much more fun and enjoyable exercising is.  Instead of "Ugh. Exercise." you'll be saying "Yeah!  Exercise!".  Schedule time for you every day to take care of you in each of those 5 areas so that you can be the best you possible!  You are awesome!  You are beautiful and special just the way you are!  Remember, God made you the way you are for a grand and glorious purpose!  We are all different for a reason!  Embrace who you are!  Do what you love!  And . . .

be.YOU.tiful!!!