I so hope you are seeing a change in your life! I hope that if you have decided to use the tools that you are feeling lighter and are able to deal with life better. I know these tools and the information I have given you can change your life if you will just make the decision to use it and apply it!! And the exciting thing is that there is always more truth to learn! Please let me know if you have any questions or concerns.
I promised in my last post that I would give you a tool to help with your relationships. It is a simple tool that helps us find out who we are by recognizing the things that make us feel on top of the world. This tool also distinguishes from getting our needs met externally vs. getting them met internally. So you are already on your way to understanding this new tool because in my last post you learned the difference between external and internal fulfillment of our needs. Once we use this new tool for ourselves, we can then have our family do it which enables us to know what makes them tick and feel amazing and thus helps us better relate to them. By using this tool, I have had increased fulfillment in my own life and because I have had my husband and children do it too, our relationships have greatly improved. Its called the Emotional Fingerprint.
A short time ago I was introduced to a man named Woody Woodward. He has an incredible story, but what's even more amazing is what he has done with his story. He has used his experiences and gifts to do tons of research and thousands of interviews on not only how to personally live a more fulfilling and rewarding life, but also how to interact better with family members, friends, and associates. He created this tool of the Emotional Fingerprint which basically has us identify 7 different key things that make us feel amazing. It really is just that simple. Like I have said many times before, the more aware we can become about ourselves, the more power and forward momentum we can have. This tool that Woody has created is based in truth which is why it is working for so many people who are already using it and applying it in their lives. If you think about tools in a tool belt, they are a means to help get the job done better and quicker. They don't replace the job, they assist us in it. That is exactly what these emotional tools can do for us. They are not a replacement of truth, but rather a facilitator of truth to help us get this job of life done in a way that enables us to be healthier and happier in all areas of our life.
After finding out my own Emotional Fingerprint, I had each of my children and my husband do it also. I have a lovely 14 year old teenage daughter. We have a hard time getting along and it pains me terribly because all I want is to be close to her and be able to be there for her. After she did the Emotional Fingerprint, I realized some of the reasons why we were struggling in our relationship. Some of the things I was doing were causing her to fight back. My daughter plays basketball and just a day or two before I had her do the Emotional Fingerprint, she had said to my husband (who then told me because he felt I needed to know;)) that I was not allowed to come to any more of her basketball games unless I kept my mouth shut. :0 Ok I'll admit I am a very competitive person and I just really get into my kids' games and probably open my mouth too much. We just want them to excel and do their best right? Well, apparently my efforts to do that were very unappreciated by my daughter. One of the 7 things that she picked on her Emotional Fingerprint was "free and independent". She felt on top of the world when she felt "free and independent". When I would shout out in her games, I was creating a rift between us because she didn't feel "free and independent" when I did that. She didn't want me to tell her what to do. Now granted a lot of teenagers have this need. Our Emotional Fingerprint can change over time due to big events or changes in our body and mind. At this stage of her life, feeling "free and independent" is very important to her. So one of the ways I tried to strengthen our relationship was by no longer telling her what to do on the basketball court. I used some self-restraint and kept my mouth shut at her games.
A couple of nights after she did the Emotional Fingerprint, I decided I was going to go test it out by going down to her room and chatting with her. I had committed all of her 7 things to memory so that I could communicate with her based on her needs. Another one of her 7 things was being in a loving relationship. I was able to fill 2 of her needs by communicating with her in a loving way without offending her need to feel free and independent. By the end of our conversation, I was able to in some way fulfill all 7 of the things that made her feel awesome and important. We hugged and she told me she loved me. The next morning, she said to me, "So you're coming to my game today right?" Holy cow! Just a couple days before she was saying she didn't want me at her games and now she was making sure I was going to be there! And this all happened because I used my daughters Emotional Fingerprint to better relate to her. It is amazing and it works! I have used each of my children's Emotional Fingerprint to better relate to them and better understand what they need in their lives in order to feel awesome. My son's Emotional Fingerprint blew me away! He is a very calm, quiet kid and doesn't put up much of a stink around the house. The 7 things he chose that made him feel amazing were things I really would not have picked for him. So I went to go talk to him just to make sure he had done it right. My son loves to play video games. So as we went over his Emotional Fingerprint, I realized that when he plays his video games, all 7 of his needs get met. No wonder he loves video games so much!! Validation, appreciation, praise, needed and others! So I determined in that moment to give my son more of the things he needs so that he won't have to go elsewhere to get those things fulfilled. Don't we as parents want to do everything we can to make our children feel awesome, loved, understood and confident? Now of course we have our family rules. Just because I am using my children's Emotional Fingerprint to better relate to them doesn't mean I give in to all their wants and desires. We have a time limit for my son on video games. We still have guidelines and rules in our family, but the way in which I enforce them is different so that at the same time I can be fulfilling my children's Emotional Fingerprints.
My husband's Emotional Fingerprint has been harder to nail down. He has had a hard time choosing which 7 things apply to him the most. But as we have paid attention to when he is happy and then when he gets frustrated or upset, we are discovering his 7 things. Knowing each others' 7 needs are helping us relate and understand each other so much better. I have a need to feel "accepted" which I always knew but which the Emotional Fingerprint helped nail down even more for me. So my husband now knows that if he can be careful about not offending my need to feel accepted in our conversations, then our conversation goes better. I am also learning to be more internal with my need to feel accepted so what other people say or do doesn't bother me as much. As I am learning similar things about my husband, it enables me in our interactions to give him the things that he needs. I think the world of Woody and absolutely love the awareness this tool has given me in my relationships so that I can do my part to make them happier and healthier. Its an incredible tool!!
In order to better explain this tool to you, I really need to chat with you over the phone and even meet with you. Woody also does home presentations so if enough of you are interested we can set up a time where Woody can come and share with all of us this incredible information. Please email me at rachellerchase@yahoo.com or comment at the end of this post if you are interested. You can also learn more about Woody and the Emotional Fingerprint at nomoretherapy.com. I have included a link to Woody over in my Links to Amazing People list. I just love the Emotional Fingerprint and it has completely helped me revolutionize the way I deal with my family members so that we are all happier and more fulfilled in our lives. It works!
I'll leave this post as is and I'll be back soon to talk about something else that is critical to our healing! Stay tuned and please . . .
be.YOU.tiful!!
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