Another fabulous tool that I have used to help me be self-aware is called the Life Cycle. We each experience this cycle in our own way. By becoming aware of what our cycle looks like and means for us, we enable ourselves to quickly move from our lowest point to feeling on top of the world again. This is the Life Cycle:
So let me describe it to you. We start at the top feeling on top of the world. Life is good. We feel happy, complete and peaceful. Then something happens to us or we believe a certain negative thought about ourselves and we start to slip. As I have paid attention to my life cycle, I have realized I slip when I start thinking "I don't care." Whether it's I don't care about what I eat, about getting myself ready in the morning, about exercising, or whatever it may be, not caring causes me to slip down that slippery slope. I have realized that I NEED to care and I NEED to do the things that make me feel good physically or else my mental, emotional and spiritual state is adversely affected. Because of this tool, I now know that if I allow myself to not care, Satan sneaks in and drags me down. And that is why the word "aware" is there off to the right. If we aren't aware of what our thought and belief patterns are that cause us to slip, then we won't have the power to change them or the results we get from them.
So the first question mark represents the reasons, thoughts, or behaviors that cause you to slip. What triggers the slip for you? What are the thoughts and beliefs that cause you to start falling from a state of peace and joy?
The fall can be frustrating and often causes us to feel alone, sad and anxious. Nobody wants to fall from a place of peace and joy, but because we are human, we WILL fall time and time again. When my mentor described this cycle to me, he had me draw myself falling. Guess how I drew myself? I drew myself falling head first into a slab of cement. Without consciously recognizing it, my drawing alluded to the fact that my falls were extremely hard and painful, completely knocking me out and rendering me unable both physically and emotionally to move on. But why were my falls so painful? It was because I had deceived myself into believing that I could be perfect and never fall. I was unaware of the thoughts and beliefs which caused me to slip, thus I was completely unprepared for my impending fall and hard landing. Those falls slammed me. I would spend months, even years, down at that lowest point, in my pit of despair, because I had been so deeply hurt. I didn't want to get back up just so I could feel all that pain again. I became depressed, discouraged, and apathetic. I died inside, going numb emotionally because feeling at all was just too hard.
There are three different types of people - the dabblers, the stressors, and the masters. The dabblers are the ones that after some forward progress and healing, they hit a plateau or a hard point and then they give up and quit. They see the plateau or hard point as failure. They expect perfection and when things aren't perfect, they give up trying. Everything is black or white. When they aren't succeeding, they are failing and when they fail, there's no point in continuing on. This was what I was. I would fall, land hard and stay down, depressed and discouraged, because if I couldn't be perfect then why try.
The stressors reach that plateau or that hard point and say, "There is no way I'm going to fall! I will not fail!" Because they are not aware of the slip coming, when it comes they panic, stress and fight it in order to get back to the top. It's like they are going down a slide, but before they reach the bottom, they turn around and try to climb back up the slide even though they have mittens on their hands and socks on their feet. This may postpone their landing, but it doesn't prevent it. Eventually they do fall, but because they are a stressor, they push through, using force and anger to claw their way back up to the top. They may reach the top again, but they leave a wake of destruction behind them. They create a huge mess, particularly with those they love, as they fight the natural cycle in order to be on top. Both the dabblers and the stressors are reactive to difficult situations.
The master spends as much time up top as possible while always expecting the slip to come. They recognize their imperfect, mortal nature, thus they are not deceived into believing they will never fall. Their awareness allows them to see the slip coming. Their fearlessness allows them to calmly let the fall happen. Their preparedness makes the fall far less painful to endure. For the master, little time is spent down at that lowest point because they immediately do something to climb back out. The master is proactive, expecting and preparing for future difficult situations.
Self-mastery doesn't mean we are strong enough or have enough self-control to keep ourselves from falling. It means we understand our natural man condition rather than beating ourselves up for it. It means we let go of any expectations or attachments to an ideal of perfection.
Favorite Quote #60:
A warrior is not about perfection or victory or invulnerability. He is about absolute vulnerability. That's the only true courage.
Peaceful Warrior
A peaceful warrior. A master. That's what we want to be. Being a warrior or a master means we understand the ebb and flow of life, the yin and yang. We let life flow through the good times and the hard times. We "let go and let God" (Wayne Dyer).
So what is your soft landing? What do you envision it to be? Are you a dabbler, a stressor, or a master? If you want to be a master, then are you willing to accept your fall and allow it to happen? Because if you do, this life cycle can take you 7 minutes to get through instead of 7 months. I've done it and it's amazing!
After we have fallen, we have a choice. It's completely up to us how long we are going to stay at that lowest point. We can wallow in self-pity and mourn the loss of our happy and peaceful state, or we can do something to get back to it. I have spoken about this before when I talked about living in the moment. We can waste our valuable, precious time by living in the past, dwelling on how good it was, or we can use that time to live in the moment and change where we are now to get back to where we want to be. I know that is putting it bluntly and believe me I am talking about myself because I did a lot of wallowing and time-wasting. The only way to get out from our pit of despair is to act. So how? How do we climb out? If we look to the example of the master, they acknowledge they have fallen without guilt and shame. They realize falling is part of their human condition. They then identify which tool they need from within their emotional tool belt that will enable them to climb out of their pit of despair . . . and then they use it. They act on truth.
So what are your tools? What helps you to climb out of your lowest point? The Write and Burn? The Little Black Book? Prayer? Meditation? Scripture study? Music? Positive affirmations? By identifying the tool you need in that moment, you provide for yourself the needed help to quickly make your way back up to the top. This act of climbing back up creates feelings of hope, desire and courage. You're working and acting on the positive to combat the negative, so naturally you are going to get positive back.
After climbing, we then come to the last slope leading to the top. This is still a slippery slope. There is also great opposition at this point as represented by the wind off to the left. If you think about Satan, when does he tend to attack the hardest and strongest? Just before a positive, good thing is going to happen, right? So we still need help reaching the top. The help comes through the rope. When we hold onto it and follow it, it leads us back to the top. Our rope is our reason why, our purpose. It is our belief in why we are here, our reason for living. It gives meaning to all we do in life. It breeds passion and provides direction. It gives us the inspiration to keep going, the determination to do whatever it takes to get back on top.
So what is your rope? What is your reason why? What is the wind that blows hard against you trying to thwart your efforts to get back up to the top? What are Satan's tactics that create resistance on your forward, upward progress?
Your homework is to find the answers to all of these questions. And remember, the answers can only come from inside of you.
Repeat of Favorite Quote #34:
Everyone tells you what to do and what's good for you. They don't want you to find your own answers. They want you to believe theirs. I want you to stop gathering information from outside yourself and start getting it from the inside. People are afraid of what's inside. And that's the only place they're ever going to find what they need.
Peaceful Warrior
So take some time to figure out your life cycle. Dig a little in order to discover what each part of the cycle means for you. When you are aware of what your life cycle looks like, then Satan can no longer catch you unaware. Negativity can no longer come through a back door or a side door. It can only come through the front door and when that happens, you will be waiting for it, fully ready and prepared to defeat it.
One of my favorite chapters in the Book of Mormon illustrates this. It is Alma 49. The city of Ammonihah had been defeated in the past by the Lamanites, the bad guys. ;) Moroni, the leader of the Nephites (the good guys), commands the Nephites to build up the fortifications around the city of Ammonihah in preparation for another attack by the Lamanites. Here is what the Nephites did to their city:
Behold, I said that the city of Ammonihah had been rebuilt. I say unto you, yea, that it was in part rebuilt; and because the Lamanites had destroyed it once because of the iniquity of the people, they supposed that it would again become an easy prey for them.
But behold, how great was their disappointment; for behold, the Nephites had dug up a ridge of earth round about them, which was so high that the Lamanites could not cast their stones and their arrows at them that they might take effect, neither could they come upon them save it was by their place of entrance.
Alma 49: 3-4
Now at this time the chief captains of the Lamanites were astonished exceedingly, because of the wisdom of the Nephites in preparing their places of security.
Now the leaders of the Lamanites had supposed, because of the greatness of their numbers, yea, they supposed that they should be privileged to come upon them as they had hitherto done; yea, and they had also prepared themselves with shields, and with breastplates; and they had also prepared themselves with garments of skins, yea, very thick garments to cover their nakedness.
And being thus prepared they supposed that they should easily overpower and subject their brethren to the yoke of bondage, or slay and massacre them according to their pleasure.
But behold, to their uttermost astonishment, they [the Nephites] were prepared for them, in a manner which never had been known among the children of Lehi.
Alma 49: 5-8
The captains of the Lamanites feared the preparations the Nephites had made to the city of Ammonihah so much that they retreated and did not attack. They then made their way to another city of the Nephites called Noah, thinking they could overcome that city and taking an oath that they would destroy it. But Moroni had done the same thing at Noah as he had done at Ammonihah, in fact Noah had been fortified and rebuilt even greater and stronger. So despite their fear and due to the oath they had made, the Lamanite captains led their army in an attack against Noah. This is what happened:
Now behold, the Lamanites could not get into their forts of security by any other way save by the entrance, because of the highness of the bank which had been thrown up, and the depth of the ditch which had been dug round about, save it were by the entrance.
And thus were the Nephites prepared to destroy all such as should attempt to climb up to enter the fort by any other way, by casting over stones and arrows at them.
Thus they were prepared, yea, a body of their strongest men, with their swords and their slings, to smite down all who should attempt to come into their place of security by the place of entrance; and thus were they prepared to defend themselves against the Lamanites.
And it came to pass that the captains of the Lamanites brought up their armies before the place of entrance, and began to contend with the Nephites, to get into their place of security; but behold, they were driven back from time to time, insomuch that they were slain with an immense slaughter.
Alma 49: 18-21
Holy cow! Do you get that? Do you see how that applies to us? When we are aware of our life cycle, we are able to prepare ourselves for the attacks of Satan. Satan is victorious due to his tactic of surprise. His surprise attacks defeat us most every time. But we disarm him when we take that element of surprise away, when we prevent him from attacking us at any other place but through the front door. When we fortify ourselves in this way, we will always be able to see him coming. We will then have the power to catch him and defeat him by stopping any tactic or device he uses to destroy us. Powerful stuff!!
The story concludes with this verse:
Thus the Nephites had all power over their enemies; and thus the Lamanites did attempt to destroy the Nephites until their chief captains were all slain; yea, and more than a thousand of the Lamanites were slain; while, on the other hand, there was not a single soul of the Nephites which were slain.
Alma 49: 23
All power over their enemies! And not a single soul of the Nephites were slain! Isn't that what we all want? The power to defeat all our enemies and not be slain? Absolutely! And this is how we do it! So please take the time to become aware and prepare yourselves. Because . . .
If ye are prepared ye shall not fear.
D&C 38: 30
We have nothing to fear when we are prepared.
I know this is possible. I have been able to defeat Satan in my own life because I became aware of how he took me down, I prepared for it, then I expected it and remained ever watchful for when he came attacking. Knowledge is power! By gaining this knowledge, we gain power to defeat all the forces of evil and negativity that try to destroy us.
May you take the time to empower yourselves, to be aware and prepare by building up your fortifications so that your enemies can only come in through the front door . . . and by doing that, their defeat is guaranteed.
As it is said in Star Wars, "May the force be with you!" Go be powerful and . . .
be.YOU.tiful!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment